It’s not you, Facebook. It’s me. Really.
Facebook and I had a love/hate relationship for a long time. A REALLY long time. I joined Facebook back in the days when it was college kids only, a cool way to keep up with high school buddies.
Then I became a mom. And I became addicted to Facebook.
I found myself scrolling through my news feed day in and day out, searching for…what? I’m not sure, really.
I mean, I loved seeing pictures of my first grade B.F.F’s new gansta boyfriend and seeing my brother’s friend’s cousin’s new tat.
But really when I was honest with myself, Facebook was an escape. It was a place I ran to when my life felt too hard, when there were too many dishes to wash, when my kids were driving me nuts. It was a place to go and be brainless and not think about the things that were in front of me.
Facebook left me empty. It left me feeling like a second class mom when I saw my old friends looking so hot in their skinny jeans. It made me feel like a second class wife when I saw so and so’s Valentine’s present for her new man.
The breaking point for me was when I found myself taking pictures of my children, not so that I could enjoy them and remember a moment, but because I thought it would be awesome to share it on Facebook. Because I could show the world that my life could look perfect too.
And that was when I had to go. It was hard breaking up, really. I miss hearing about friends’ new babies or marriages or jobs. But it has given me so much freedom to be me. I can be ME and not have to worry if someone else is a better mom or wife or anything that I want to be.
Letting go has opened up space in my life and my head to invest and enjoy my children in a new way. It has given me the freedom to enjoy a moment because it is a special moment, not because it is a moment I want the world to see.
Sorry, Facebook, but I had to go.
Photo courtesy of freeditigalphotos.net